It'd been a long time
by Migobkn
Summary: It'd been a long time since I had battled Sans, and the battle with him taught me the empathy I needed to give up the fight. A month later, I return to the fateful judgement room to apologize, atone for my sins, and say Goodbye. (Rated T for some language)


The judgement hall was a familiar sight. Filtered light shone through stained-glass windows, and the beams fell softly among the floor tiles, giving an impression of significance. Archaic columns stood tall, hiding my view of the skeleton that I impossibly knew was there.

It had been a long time.

Taking my first couple steps forward, I experienced a stab of regret and apprehension. After all, I was going to have to face my sins head on. But I owed it to him.

As I took another couple steps closer, a smiling skeleton with pupilless eyes stepped out from behind a pillar.

"Take another step, kid, and you're going to have a bad time."

The emotions flew back. Guilt, regret, and shame surged through my being, wracking my brain in invisible spasms of agony.

"S-Sans..." I managed to choke out.

"What's the matter, kiddo, getting cold feet? Don't tell me you got those from Murdering My Brother In Snowdin," he snarled.

Taken aback, I recoiled, as if struck by the memories. After a second, I regained my composure and remembered what I was there for.

"Sans, I'm sorry. I'm really truly sorry."

The words echoed around the corridor, falling on deaf ears.

"And why should I believe you? You killed all of monsterkind." Sans said dimly, as if resigned to his fate. His dull words shocked me to my core.

"Sans, please! I know you can see it! My face, my guilt, my pain! It's been a long time since I did that, and I've come to atone. I promise to RESET!"

Just like that, I had gotten Sans's attention. Although I was far from attaining his trust. Sans paused for a few seconds, visibly considering his options. After a while, curiosity won out over vengeance.

"What do you mean, 'a long time?'"

And with that, all the words came spilling out.

"It's been a long time since I fought you, perhaps a month. You finally accomplished what you came here for, getting me to give up. After enduring your attacks and mastering your pattern for the most part, I was finally stopped by your final attack. I spent a good ten to twenty hours trying to beat you, but you always killed me on that final attack. But, being killed over and over gave me time to rethink my motivations. It made me think about whether I really cared about exterminating all monsters.

I'm gonna be honest, Sans. At first, I only cared about new experiences. Each person that I met and befriended or killed was simply a set of "dialogue options" that I could hear. And the entire reason that I went through the Underground was for the idea of completion. Like beating a video game.

When I first did my pacifist run, I also did it out of the same "desire for completion." Therefore, it was only natural that that same desire for completion took me to a genocide route. The desire to test myself...I had heard about "the tough Undyne and Sans fights."

Ironically, it was the genocide run, and not the pacifist run, that truly taught me empathy. Kinda the way I am I guess, I have to fuck up pretty badly first, but I'll eventually find a way to make it right.

I'm sorry Sans. I really can't apologize enough. I'm so sorry. Because of me, Papyrus is dead. Because of me, everyone you love is dead. And I can't atone for that enough. I don't know if I'll ever be able to look all of you guys in the face again knowing that I've killed all of you before.

I wish there was some way to make things right. As soon as I can, I will definitely RESET. But I don't know where I'll go from there. Will I befriend you guys again and live above ground?

You see, this is pretty hard for you to understand, probably. I...am an entity that controls Frisk, the kid in the striped shirt. I'm older, 17, and a guy. I can only control Frisk until the end of the "game," though. So, as soon as you guys escape into the Above Ground, I can't experience that with you guys. I think I'm going to get you guys above ground again, because you deserve what I gave to you initially, but, after that, I won't be able to hang out with you guys anymore. I won't be able to be with you guys anymore. I'm sorry.

It's hard to explain...but it makes it hard for me to commit on a happy ending. You see, I've already experienced almost everything your universe has to offer. Can you see how that would leave someone bored and slightly depressed?

So, I'm going to have to leave. As much as I never want to let you guys and this beautiful experience I've had behind, I have to leave.

I'm honestly a little apprehensive and more than a little sad. But I've learned an extremely important lesson from you guys: empathy.

I guess what I'm trying to say is Sorry, Thank you, and Goodbye all at the same time."

And then, I fell silent, waiting anxiously as Sans seemed to take it all in. Throughout my whole monologue, Sans seemed to want to believe me, but wasn't ready to trust me just yet.

"Kid, as much as I'd like to believe that, don't you think it sounds a little too far-fetched? I mean first I have to believe that you're from an alternate universe and somehow have control over Frisk and then I have to believe that you truly feel sorry for what you've done? I'm sorry, but I can't believe you there. As soon as I saw you kill Papyrus, I made a promise to never trust you again. I saw how you acted nice to him up until the last moment, where you viciously and brutally betrayed the trust that he so graciously gave you. Papyrus always chose to see the good in people, and forget the bad. But I'm not Papyrus, and I'll never let that happen to me."

Honestly, I can understand him. I've made the same promise before, and I'm the exact same kind of person. But, I really want to be able to say Goodbye on good terms.

-Your desire to be forgiven fills you with determination-

I noticed I still had the knife in my hand, and threw it away with contempt. Looking at Sans's level stare, I took off my sweatshirt to reveal that I had no concealed weapons, nothing to hide. Sans still didn't appear to be satisfied. I needed proof. Proof that at least one of the things that I said was true.

"Sans, I know about the lady that you told jokes to through the wall. I know about how Grillby's ketchup caps are way too loose and dump ketchup all over your burger. I know that Papyrus gets mad if you pass him on your tricycle when you pass him on the freeway. I know about your hidden lab, and your experiments. I know that Papyrus has an outfit that says "Cool Dude" on the front. Does that prove that I can see things from another universe?"

"Actually, it doesn't, kiddo. You could have learned all those things from going through multiple RESETS. You're gonna need something that actually proves that you're from another universe."

Shit. I knew I should have learned how to program in Gamemaker. Then, it clicked.

"Sans, I know about Gaster."

His entire face contorted with shock. "How do you know that name?" he asked me urgently.

"I learned of him through means of knowledge inherent to my own universe, where there is an infinite web of information available to people."

"I see...everyone forgot about him except me, even Papyrus. And I never would talk about him with anyone, too much of a social recluse heh heh. Guess I'm gonna have to believe you on this one kid. Then how do I know you're really sorry for what you've done?"

"Well..."

I had to think for a minute. Anything nice or friendly I did for him could be interpreted as a pretense; I really didn't have a lot of options.

Then I realized my way out.

"Sans, if I fight you and beat you, the entire world will be destroyed. Of both humans and monsters, by a being called "Chara." I know this cause of the infinite knowledge in my other universe. And, I care about everyone in this universe now. Enough to RESET and never RESET again. So please. Believe me, okay? Do you have a codeword for this kind of situation?"

"Actually, I do," Sans interjected. It's "Throw me a bone and slap me silly." Sans couldn't help smiling to himself, and the smile was contagious.

"Haha, okay. Funny codeword you got there," I teased gently.

"heh. well, don't wear it out," Sans replied.

"Okay, I just wanna say thanks for believing in me enough to trust me this time, I promise you'll never regret it."

"Yeah, it's okay, just RESET to before this ever happened and tell me the keyword. I'll be able to figure out what happened from there."

"Okay, will do." I closed my eyes and felt the familiar power flow within me. And by that I mean I pressed a button on my keyboard and selected "true reset." But I have the right to a be a little dramatic, don't I?

Before I knew it, I was back at the golden flowers, in the room before meeting to Flowey.

I made my way through the ruins with haste, not even stopping to pick up a monster candy or spider donut and fleeing every battle along the way. I pushed past Toriel, telling her I'd promise to visit her later and ran down into the ruins exist, my mind solely on one goofy skeleton.

Finally, I reached Papyrus's bridge, and heard the familiar twig break again.

"Don't you know how to greet a new pal? Turn around, human, and shake my hand."

"Throw me a bone and slap me silly."

Sans froze up for a second, then started chuckling to himself.

"Good to have you back, kiddo."


End file.
